Sarcastic Quotes: Some of the most famous men and women of the last two centuries are responsible for statements literally dripping with sarcasm. In most of these cases, sarcastic quotes have added spice to an otherwise dry or ridiculous situation. Of course, sarcasm is a key factor in successful comedy routines. But it also provides key lessons about life, being human and about truth.
That’s why the most intelligent and perceptive among us use sarcasm daily, often writing their thoughts so as to preserve them for future generations. Almost everything about life is fair game for sarcasm, if only because it keeps us from taking things too seriously.
While we could spend days, even weeks, quoting people who knew the importance of sarcasm it might be best to restrict ourselves in this short space. Enjoy all of the sarcastic quotes offered here and pay particular attention to the words of U.S. celebrity Groucho Marx – comedian, game-show host and movie star. His short, to-the-point observations often contained more truth about the human condition than we find in most books.
Others worthy of note are Mark Twain, H.L. Mencken and the one-and-only Winston Churchill. If you want to try one of these great quotes, make sure the situation and the audience are right!
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives – Abba Eban.
He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know – Abraham Lincoln.
I am convinced that God does not play dice – Albert Einstein.
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others – Ambrose Bierce.
Sarcasm: A literary device for identifying the stupid – Anonymous.
Epic Sarcastic Quotes
I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it – Anonymous.
Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence – Ashleigh Brilliant.
Colombian humor is very black, very sarcastic – Barbet Schroeder.
If you are first you are first. If you are second you are nothing – Bill Shankly.
He has Van Gogh’s ear for music – Billy Wilder.
Why do we laugh at such terrible things? Because comedy is often the sarcastic realization of inescapable tragedy – Bryant H. McGill.
Sarcastic Quotes About Ungrateful People
It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them – Caron de Beaumarchais.
I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure – Clarence Darrow.
My mom was sarcastic about men. She would tell me Adam was the rough draft and Eve was the final product. She was a feminist minister, an earth mom who wore a bra only on Sundays – Daphne Zuniga.
It’s not an inside joke if the voices in your head and you only understand it – Eli.
Sarcastic quotes funny work quotes
I got into therapy in the fifth grade because I said in a sarcastic way that I was going to kill myself, and they didn’t get it then. Nothing’s changed – Fiona Apple.
He loves nature in spite of what it did to him – Forrest Tucker.
The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced – Frank Zappa.
The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech – George Bernard Shaw.
Sarcastic quotes for boss
When ideas fail, words come in very handy – Goethe.
A narcissist is someone better looking than you are – Gore Vidal.
I didn’t like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions – the curtain was up – Groucho Marx.
He is a self-made man and worships his creator – Irvin S. Cobb.
A good listener is usually thinking about something else – Kin Hubbard.
You have delighted us long enough – Jane Austen.
Sarcastic quotes about deadbeat dads
There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world – Jean Baudrillard.
He has such a patronizing tone and manner, and such a sarcastic sense of humor. I found him rather brutal, a kind of elegant brutality which appealed. No, I think he came pretty much off the page – Jeremy Northam.
I’m good at being sarcastic with guys. They don’t want the quiet, prissy little things – Jessica Alba.
Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing – John Erskine.
Sarcastic quotes about attention seekers
Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas – Johnny Carson.
A sarcastic person has a superiority complex that can be cured only by the honesty of humility – Lawrence G. Lovasik.
I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it – Mark Twain.
The trouble with a kitten is that it eventually becomes a cat – Ogden Nash.
Sassy short sarcastic quotes
Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome – Oscar Levant.
He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends – Oscar Wilde.
It’s always darkest before it turns absolutely pitch black – Paul Newman.
My father was a very unhappy person, very sarcastic, and my mother was very nervous and worried about what people thought. They weren’t monsters, but it wasn’t a good childhood – Paula Danziger.
Inspiring sarcastic quotes
I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here – Stephen Bishop.
He was happily married – but his wife wasn’t – Victor Borge.
We didn’t lose the game; we just ran out of time – Vince Lombardi.
A modest little person, with much to be modest about – Winston Churchill.
Also Read: Best 50+ Sorry Quotes, Sayings for Apologies